Or the Difference Between You and a Man Who Can Make Me Kneel
Someone asked me the other day how I can be submissive to some men and dominant to others. Some of you may not realize that I identify as a switch, particularly those of you who live to please me. Switches are the bisexuals of the kink world – going back and forth between roles and confusing the fuck out of those who are focused solely on one side or the other of the power exchange spectrum. Often there is confusion as to how to relate – who is on top and who is on bottom?
For me, it’s simple: the alpha male, the man who expresses an aggressive confidence, an I-know-what-is-mine, do-what-I-demand attitude tends to inspire my desire to submit. Of course, that man must be intelligent, confident, motivated, successful. The number of men who this describes is extraordinarily small. The rest of you are betas.
To put it simply: you have to be able to keep up or I will pin you under my heel.
If you’re reading this blog, probably this applies to you. Let’s face it, most of you just don’t have what it takes – and you know it. Perhaps you pretend to be an alpha in your public life, but secretly you know what you really are and you call me so you can confess and reveal your true beta self: an inadequate pretender desperate to be put in his place, abused, used, humiliated, teased, caged, owned.
A large number of you need to be witness to an alpha’s domination of a dominant woman. Some call this cuckolding and I think that’s an appropriate label. It’s a bit different than vanilla cucking, because there is a distinctive hierarchy in play: you, the beta, are less than the sub who is dominant to you. The alpha exerts power over you through her, or directly…it varies. But the presence of an alpha who can control the woman who controls you only reinforces your position at the very bottom. You are constantly being compared to the better man – he is literally standing next to you, highlighting all your flaws; every inadequacy is visible and noted.
When you don’t measure up, you have to make up for what you lack through service and submission. Otherwise there is no reason for me to waste my time and attention on you. You must endeavor to please me, to amuse me, to spoil me to keep my interest and understand that all the while, I’m craving the attention of someone else – the alpha that you’re not.